@YoungNobler: They should make custom Starbucks cards that say, "I wouldn't normally be buying your coffee, but I got this gift card."
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@tsm560: Her: About last night, please understand that wasn't me... that was the wine. Me: ... Her: ... Me: Do you have a phone number for that wine?
@Donna_McCoy: Just turned a corner and bumped into a woman with drawn-on eyebrows. I'm not sure which of us was more surprised.
@angelunatic_: Picture me and my boyfriend on a dinner date Wrong We're sitting on the same side of the table making you uncomfortable