@shariv67: This Dollar Store thesaurus sure is coming in...
@Hormonella: Facebook is terrific way to connect with classmates who haven't aged as well as you.
@alldrolledup: 4 out of 5 dead husbands agree that last casserole tasted really strange.
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Who ate all the cookies?
Me: I didn’t see them.
5-year-old: No one ever does.
@Book_Krazy: "What's that?"
A divorce jar. Every time we fight you put a dollar in and I'm a little bit closer to freedom.
*puts in dollar* "WTH!?!"
@smilely_gal: 7: "Mama, if someone licked the treadmill, would that someone get sick?"
Me: "Are you the someone?"