@RocketRankoon: This ebola scare is getting out of hand I just threw ebola at someone who said good morning to me before I had my coffee
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@BigBBanter: Friend is going bungee jumping so I told him he was born because of a broken rubber and he could die the same way. He didn't laugh...
@NicestHippo: Mario is a game where you save a girl from the terrible fate of hanging with a dude who owns a castle
@okimstillhungry: Me on Masterchef: Ive made a roasted pork kebab breaded with buttermilk cornbread and served with a tomato reduction Them: This is a corndog