@RocketRankoon: This ebola scare is getting out of hand I just threw ebola at someone who said good morning to me before I had my coffee
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@therealeatwood: ME: So you indicate action using airstrikes? HER: What? No, I said asterisks. ME: Ha, of course. [to walkie-talkie] Disengage. DISENGAGE!
@_wendyb07: Just some repair guys and me at work right now. If a pizza delivery guy and a director show up, I'm leaving.
@neptunemoons: "Mom! Mom! Hold this cockroach while I grab the lizard!" --Things I honestly never imagined I'd hear as a parent