@ConanOBrien: This summer, camp counselors all over the country will shine flashlights under their chins and read the headlines.
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@novicefather: I found three french fries inside my $1 McDouble. Dream big, kids. Anything is possible.
@Shock_Monster: I swear to holy hell, Aunt Pat, I would rather lick a midget's taint than accept your invitation to play Lucky Slots.
@Mr_Kapowski: *guy looks around to see if anyone is looking* *sees the coast is clear, licks tree* And that's how they found out about maple syrup