@BlindChow: Though he came from a long line of spoons, Sammy Spork always noticed a slight resemblance to Mom's friend Frank, the fork living next door.
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@iMikosnyc: Why yes, person on the Internet, I would love to make $596 per day sitting at home. Let's do this!!!
@VeryLonelyLuke: I adopted a rock. He just sits there and does nothing all day. It still beats raising Kylo.
@iamspacegirl: Grandpa *pulls coin from my ear* Me: Pft. Some trick. Grandpa *shoves coin into my ear, twists my nose, peanuts begin pouring from my face*
@RealDMK: I now realize that my mom did not actually have eyes in the back of her head. She just did as I do, randomly yell out "stop it" every 30 min