@JediGigi: To avoid another embarrassing moment like when I was stood up on prom night, I always keep at least 1 penguin around.
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@tsm560: You may be too old for her if she asks you what your kink is and you immediately think of your knees and your back.
@1Bad_Scientist: *at Thanksgiving dinner* Me: One of you is eating poison green bean casserole. Everyone: *gasp* Me: Just kidding you all are.
@SardonicTart: *Hires life coach* "Ok, the first thing we have to do is get you off this couch and get you moving!" *Fires life coach*