@Mike_Bianchi: To save money, instead of going to the club, I just get drunk at home and yell "what?" into a mirror over and over.
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@KyleMcDowell86: "Is Phil coming tonight?" "Phil Smith or Phil that has the eyesight of a bird?" *suddenly a man runs face first into the sliding glass door*
@Ty_Schutz: I like to leave odd yelp reviews for fast food restaurants that say things like, "Not overly racist."