@junejuly12: Today as a Random Act of Kindness, I wore a really tight sweater to work.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@QwertyJones3: [Playing piano to impress a Russian girl] "Do you like it?" Her: That's sheet music "Yes, it is." Her: Now excuse me, I huv to take a sheet.
@NewDadNotes: Jehovahs Witnesses: do you have time to talk about our lord and savior? Me: of course! please come in! [door slams shut and locks] [lights dim] [my PowerPoint presentation begins] Me: but first I wanna tell you about a timeshare opportunity!!!
@LambyMcSheeps: Sometimes you need a little distance to see things clearly, but other times it is obviously a bear and you should probably just run