@delusionaliam: Today, I saw that my ironing board cover was wrinkled. I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because irony has the word iron in it.
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@UncleDuke1969: Jim: I'm totally spacing out on a word. Me: OK J: What's that awful thing called... M: ... J: You wake up with it after you drink? M: Linda.
@AntozWolf: I dig, you dig, we dig, he dig, she dig, they dig.... Its not a beautiful poem, but its very deep.
@Geanina_26K: I'm going to nap so hard today, my pillow Is going to need a cigarette when I'm done with it
@tdawks: The hurt I feel when someone leaves the bus seat next to mine for a newly empty one is almost exactly equal to my annoyance when they don't.