@IamEnidColeslaw: today I went for a run & a homeless guy was like WHAT ARE YOU RUNNING FROM & I was like EVERYTHING
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@dshack8: Pre-Having Daughters: *Hates hearing "NO" from women Post-Having Daughters: *Teaches them "NO" in 167 different languages including Klingon
@lecalabara: You people that are getting laid regularly either need to keep that stuff to yourselves or be more descriptive.
@JayDee422: I'm close to $100,000 deep in student loans for my English degree and I just used the word "awesome" 10 times in a row to describe a guy.
@Tups13: Eating Doritos and watching Judge Judy in my underpants. Whoa! Dude! Why is Judge Judy in my house? And why is she wearing my underpants??