@JennyJohnsonHi5: Today is Star Wars Day, which means we should all reflect on a simpler time in our lives, when Harrison Ford didn't have an earring.
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@faisaladam_: I just saw a poster that said "have you seen this man?" With a number to call... So I called the number and told them "No."
@RocketRankoon: A little bit of rain and everyone forgets how to drive. Saw one guy try to start his car with a pancake.
@baycontaco: I've started picking up dudes by walking into Starbucks and "accidentally" dropping my recipe for bacon tacos.
@Kaladas4U2NV: I lost 7 followers today. It's nice to know some people are finally reading my tweets