@_Tempo11: Told my dog it's too cold to go for a walk and he just saw one from the window and now I'm a liar.
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@AdviceFromDino: Asked for Cheez-its Wife buys Cheese Nips Now she's sitting in the corner thinking about what she did.
@XplodingUnicorn: My 1-year-old thought it was funny to put food in my mouth. It was cute with Skittles. Then she switched to dog food.
@carlyken: I leave my vacuum in the middle of the floor at all times so when I have unexpected company I can say I was just about to clean my house.