@LaTreiHinton: Tom & Jerry had the realest beef of all time..... nvr said a word.... it was jus on sight ..
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@MattMcC1: YOU CAN'T BUY HOT POCKETS YOU CAN ONLY BUY COLD POCKETS YOU ARE EXPECTED SUPPLY THE HEAT YOURSELF DONT BELIEVE THE LIES.
@markedly: Friend: Dude, you need to get into her pants. Me: [imagining how soft her leggings would feel over my thighs] YES
@nettie0918: Fastest way to occupy bored kids is to announce we are going to clean Voila Suddenly they all remember plans they've forgotten Ah quiet
@Molly_Kats: WHO ARE YOU RUNNING FROM IN YOUR OWN APARTMENT YOU FAT MONSTER NEIGHBOR I shout to my ceiling.