@13spencer: Tonight's Golden Globes taught us that, no matter how much you spend on surgery, nobody looks good while sweaty.
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@TimHaynesJr: That heroic moment where one of your chips break off in the dip and you send another one into save it.
@VapingSonic: ME: haha u dare me to take off all my clothes and run thru this park COP: no ME: wow I cant believe ur making me do this lol COP: I'm not
@QwertyJones3: Doctor: "Just lie back and relax, I'll start the lasik eye procedure in a moment." *Turns on laser* *Patient's face is attacked by cats*