@13spencer: Toys 'R Us pulled Breaking Bad figures because the characters sold drugs, but continue to sell Darth Vader ones, and he blew up a planet.
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@Parkerlawyer: Before you call me, ask yourself, “Can I text it?” Before you text me, ask yourself, “Can I email it?” Before you email me, ask yourself, “Can I just think it really, really hard?”
@whatmaddness: A super villain who foils all your plots, but your plots are just lasagnas and he makes them cook super unevenly.
@envydatropic: Something touched my leg while in the ocean and apparently I can walk on water now
@thepunningman: CEO: It's got wheels Inventor: It's the best we could do CEO: You had 30 yrs I: CEO: Put "may not hover" on the box and get out of my sight