@FKACornshucks: TT: At sunday dinner I like to perform an impromptu puppet show with the roast chicken. This week it's my interpretation of Die Hard 2.
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@SaveItForFest: STOP HONKING! IF I DRIVE ANY FASTER THE TINY LIZARD THAT HITCHED A RIDE ON MY HOOD IS GONNA FALL TO HIS DEATH. HAVE SOME COMPASSION, PEOPLE.
@Mikecanrant: So carrying a "wet floor" sign and putting it down immediately after using your best pickup line on a woman is frowned upon Dating is hard.
@GrantTanaka: this idiot cop is still behind me w/ his siren on, I keep moving out of the way & waving & yelling "GO AROUND," man is he stupid