@thatUPSdude: Turns out HR doesn't care if it's national underwear day, you have to wear pants to work.
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@BatmanOffDuty: *Indian sending smoke signals* Buffalo... Coming... *other Indian replies* New... Fire... Who... Dis?
@LittleHarmonica: Men always say they like strong, smart women until you argue with them. And then they're all like: You talk too much....and I want my Mommy.
@NathanBgood: "They say there's no such thing as a free lunch. That ends today!" -- me as I rally lunches everywhere to overthrow their oppressors