@HatfieldAnne: TV chef warns against “over vegetablizing” a sandwich. I lean in closely, hoping he’s also against “under buttering” everything else.
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@highwayhooligan: I eat boiled eggs, cabbage, and baked beans before the in-laws visit. They never stay long.
@d_duhwit: *worm surgeon beside worm in hospital bed." Doc:" Surgery went good but the floor was slippery and long story short you have a son now."
@AimeeHelene1: *walks up to microphone during wedding reception* *taps on mic; everyone smiles* "Anyone that doesn't want their cake, pass it to me please"