@Thrill_Tweeter: Twitter - to help future generations discover if there's ever been any mental illness in the family.
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@Reverend_Scott: GOD: They scared enough? ANGEL: Not yet GOD: You got Trump running? ANGEL: Yup GOD: Hurricane? ANGEL: Yup GOD: Ok, send in the clowns.
@TheCatWhisprer: I hate it when I forget to bring my phone in the car and have to read a shampoo bottle while I drive.
@killlmefam: *On Ellen* ELLEN: so i see u tweet about wanting to die ME: haha yeah sometimes *Death appears, sneaks up behind me* ME: omg ellen you didnt