@roggyie: Twitter: Where if the chemistry's good, the geography won't be..
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@BareChesty: 911: What's your emergency? Me: Hunting accident. I think my friend is dead 911: Can you verify that he's dead? *gunshot* Me: Yep, he's dead
@AimeeHelene1: Wanted to respond with "Perfect!" but accidentally sent "Pervert!" That's my cue to leave. And sorry, Steve, you're probably not a pervert.
@murrman5: [interview after finishing last in the olympics] do you regret saying "I could win this race wearing flip flops" [pulls mic close] yes