@NicestHippo: Two ads? IN A ROW? On this website that gives me access to all the music ever made? I won't stand for it
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@Rollinintheseat: Interviewer: "What's your greatest accomplishment?" Me: "I was in a lot of people's MySpace Top 8s back in 2004."
@liv_thatsme: I wish I had a black stallion, so any time I got really pissed, I could angrily ride along the ocean.
@Prof_Hinkley: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Off duty cop: No *cop gets so close their mustaches interlock like velcro* You're driving great, pal