@TEXASVETERAN: Two Jehovah Witnesses walk into a bar. LOL JK. They knocked.
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@SlipCarefully: Forgot my phone and had to write my tweets on paper and pass 'em around at the meeting. nnDidn't get any stars. nGot RT'd to HR.
@GaryJanetti: Before you tell me anything about your kid you should know I'm going to mentally leave my body.
@JakeSocial: Just received an email saying: "Want to see Celine Dion live?" My first thought was that it was a ransom demand.