@ZachXJ: "Two thumbs up!" -man with 12 thumbs reviewing a movie he hated
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@Donnie_Fairburn: "Son, hey son" Yeah dad? "Know why we named you Adopted?" *Sighs* Because I'm adop- "BECAUSE YOU'RE ADOPTED" Good one dad "I'm not your dad"
@jsam1126: A guy on the street just said "nice feet" to me can someone tell me seriously if that was a cat call?
@asanders1972: A 22 year old girl said to me "there's NO WAY you are 41" I put her in my pocket and took her home. She's mine now.
@shutupmikeginn: Arguing with guy at the bar and he claimed Wikipedia was an unreliable source, suggesting instead that I listen to him, a drunk guy at a bar