@petemandik: Ugh, once again scratched my monocle falling asleep on my pile of gold coins.
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@SuburbanSleuth: Kids are back to school & all I do is worry about their guinea pig. Is she lonely? Bored? Silly? I should probably hold her. I need a life.
@robolollycop: Teach a man to fish and he will evolve to become so skilled at it that he destroys the ocean and kills every last fish. Nice one education.
@therealeatwood: GOD: Moses!! I COMMAND YOU TO—can you take your shoes off MOSES: What? Why G: I’m trying to keep the place nice, OK? M: It’s a mountain