Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of Ameiam's best tweets

@Ameiam : They say money talks, but mine barely gets a chance to introduce itself before it's gone.

@Ameiam: People are always like "you're so crazy" and I'm all like "please take off the restraints, I promise I won't do it again".

@Ameiam: So, if you get pregnant in Vegas, does the baby have to stay there?

@Ameiam: I pulled a muscle turning over in bed. Cause that's how I roll.

@Ameiam: My date told me I have nice skin. It's not like he's gonna make a mask out of it right? *nervous laugh*

@Ameiam: I'm really surprised I decided to get Botox. At least I think I'm surprised, I can't really tell.

@Ameiam: Jogging has never helped my memory.

@Ameiam: Ran into the guy who broke my heart. Totally worth the damage to my car.