@FatherWithTwins: Some Olympians have been training since they were 5.
I'm hoping my 6yo comes home from summer camp today with 2 shoes on.
@FatherWithTwins: My 5yo can't remember to take off his shirt before showering but he remembered that a month ago I said we'd go to the water park on Saturday
@FatherWithTwins: My 6yo wouldn't eat his chocolate chip muffin bec there were too many chocolate chips in it, and now I...I just...I'm gonna need a min here.
@FatherWithTwins: By the time my 5yo is done with his dinner, it'll be time to start applying to colleges.
@FatherWithTwins: I forgot my phone...
2005: I don't need to be that accessible
2010: Let's make this a short trip
2015: OH MY GOD, WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE
@FatherWithTwins: If my 5yos are holding something when I buckle them into their car seats, there's a 150% chance they'll hit me in the face with it.
@FatherWithTwins: Hell hath no fury like a 5yo who didn't get as many pepperoni pieces on his pizza slice as his brother.
@FatherWithTwins: My wife never talks about the 99 times I watched her purse and didn't lose it.