@IamEveryDayPpl: I bet Santa has 3 lists now:
Naughty, nice, and people who've left him healthy snacks instead of cookies.
@IamEveryDayPpl: Painting your own toenails is a great way to save a few bucks and to realize you’ve gained weight since the last time you painted your own toenails.
@IamEveryDayPpl: Having teenage boys over for the weekend is a great way to clean out the kitchen. It’s like hiring goats to mow the lawn.
@IamEveryDayPpl: My boss gave me his credit card for lunch and said “grab yourself something too” yet seems surprised that I went shoe shopping...
@IamEveryDayPpl: I had 3 crackers, a ketchup packet, and a yogurt that said "Liz's. Don't Touch!" for lunch in case anyone wondered if tomorrow is payday.
@IamEveryDayPpl: If salons offered free wine with a wax, Twitter moms wouldn’t have any hair at all.