@JustDontBugMe: Me: I was arrested for drunk driving.
Me: Kidding! I failed my history test.
Mom: Whew. Ok.
*2 mins later*
Mom:Failed a test??
@JustDontBugMe: Me: *carrying a heavy bag*
Him: Whoa, take it easy. Let me help.
M: I’m OK. I'm a strong, independent person. I don't need help.
M: *crying* I CAN'T FEEL MY FINGERS!
@JustDontBugMe: Mom: Why didn't you answer your phone?
M: I was in a lecture.
Mom: Where are you now?
M: Walking the dog.
Mom: You need better excuses.
M: It's the truth.
Mom: Then put the dog on.
@JustDontBugMe: My refrigerator has an excessive amount of leftovers for someone that eats as much as I do.
@JustDontBugMe: Pizza: *screaming* BUT DOES ANYONE CARE WHAT I'D LIKE TO HAVE ON TOP OF ME!?
@JustDontBugMe: When I found out that my neighbour is allergic to cats
I bought one
And I have never seen him since.