@LurkAtHomeMom: Me: But what will I eat?
Nutritionist: *provides me with a list of healthy foods*
Me: But what will I eat?
@LurkAtHomeMom: 1st Kid: spends 6 weeks sewing perfect costume
2nd Kid: *cuts holes in an old NKOTB beach towel* just say you're an 80's ghost or some shit
@LurkAtHomeMom: Me: What's the score, who's winning?
Therapist: Ok so that's really not how couples counseling works.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Time for bed!
*puts phone down*
Oops, forgot to set my alarm!
*picks phone back up and surfs the web for 7.5 hrs*
@LurkAtHomeMom: 7: [from bed] MOM!
Me: *pauses movie*
7: WHAT DOES LIGHTNING TASTE LIKE?
@LurkAtHomeMom: Just punched myself in the face trying to swat away a mosquito. Think I'm officially done with summer. Proceed with the pumpkin spice shit.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Have kids so you can regularly test the limits of your sanity by watching someone eat a starburst in 26 bites.
@LurkAtHomeMom: If you're going to get a puppy to practice raising kids, you need to get like 50 of them.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Me: Pick that up!
7: Can't you?
Me: You're lower to the ground
7: But you're used to doing things that aren't fun
How's your summer going?