@PoliUncorrect: *Crime Scene
Cop: (cuffs the dog)
Detective: what the hell are you doing?
Cop: Sir, I think we're dealing with a shapeshifter
@PoliUncorrect: I'm mad at myself for losing an argument while rehearsing it in my head, so don't tell me how hard your life is
@PoliUncorrect: If I learned anything from my childhood, its that if you cry long enough, your dead hamster will be reborn as a rabbit
@PoliUncorrect: * Pogoing Outside Your Window
~ Are... You... Sure... You... Don't... Want.... A... Second... Date?
@PoliUncorrect: Pharmacist: need any help?
Me: Yes, I'd like whatever Oprah was on when she gave each and every audience member a car