@Pork_Chop_Hair: I am not above nurturing our friendship for years just to get that secret family recipe.
@Pork_Chop_Hair: When transporting a hot cup of coffee from the microwave, I highly recommend not sneezing.
@Pork_Chop_Hair: You: Help! I’ve been shot!
Me (remembering a time I poked a hole in the side of my cup o’ noodles with a fork but held my finger over it to stop the broth from leaking while I ate): I can help.
@Pork_Chop_Hair: 9, playing an iPad game: Weird... I accidentally did something and my character became fat.
@Pork_Chop_Hair: Get you a man who isn’t really into movies: He’ll never know that sweet love note you wrote him is really just a series of lines from Field of Dreams.