Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of Roweboat13G's best tweets

@Roweboat13G : *boss stops meeting* Mike, is there something you'ld like to share with the whole group? Me: Nooooo, that's why I whispered it to Alan.

@Roweboat13G: A recent medical study shows that women who carry a little extra weight generally live longer than the men in their lives who mention it.

@Roweboat13G: I believe in karma which means I can do bad things to people all day long and just assume they deserve it.

@Roweboat13G: For a good party trick, drill a hole in the top of your medicine cabinet and fill it with marbles before you invite people over.

@Roweboat13G: Some days you're the Titanic, some days you're the iceberg and some days you're that guy who hit the propeller on the way down.

@Roweboat13G: Any salad can be a Caesar salad if you stab it enough