Funny Tweeter

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Page of SufficientCharm's best tweets

@SufficientCharm : I put my pants on like everyone else.... After sex. Ha just kidding. I don't have sex, or pants.

@SufficientCharm: 5 Stages of Pregnancy:

1: Crying

2: Peeing

3: Crying because you peed

4: Peeing because you're crying

5: The toilet is your home now

@SufficientCharm: *Squatting over cat litter box*

Husband: What the fu-

Me: THERE'S A SPIDER IN THE BATHROOM

@SufficientCharm: GOD: Let's give her ALL the awesome.

"But what if it's TOO much awesome?"

GOD: Then we'll divide it evenly between multiple personalities.

@SufficientCharm: 6am: Too tired

8am: This isn't so bad

1pm: OMG so tired

5pm: zombie

8pm: Dead

10pm: LETS SWIM THE ENGLISH CHANNEL & OVERTHINK FOR HOURS

@SufficientCharm: My boyfriend thinks it's cute when I use the clap emoji but I've just been trying to tell him that I have an STD.

@SufficientCharm: A woman isn't really heartbroken unless she does something drastic to her hair.