Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of WhiskeySoured's best tweets

@WhiskeySoured : If you feel like you're going through a rough patch, just remember that it only lasts through adulthood.

@WhiskeySoured: If a bear is chasing you, don't run. Be very still and tweet about it because you're about to die.

@WhiskeySoured: Never judge a book by its cover. Besides, you're on Twitter and don't even read books.

@WhiskeySoured: If I ever say, "Do you want me to be honest?" Say no.

@WhiskeySoured: To protest Donald Sterling's racist comments I'm going to continue to not care about basketball.

@WhiskeySoured: Are these the Americans?
No.
Are these the Americans?
No.
Are these the Americans?
No.

- watching the Olympics with my wife