Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

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Page of Wine_Honey1's best tweets

@Wine_Honey1 : Pro tip: If you smear your lipstick all over your face like the Joker, people won't talk to you.

@Wine_Honey1: If you ever come home and I'm in your house naked, I'm not stalking you. I just needed to borrow your wine opener, mine broke.

@Wine_Honey1: When placing an order online for a baby shower cake, make sure you're not half asleep.

COPULATIONS! IT'S A BOY just confuses everyone.

@Wine_Honey1: The steak that I put in the Easy Bake Oven as a child is still not done

@Wine_Honey1: Be careful how much wine you drink, might end up vacuuming the driveway in your panties

@Wine_Honey1: People tell you to make yourself at home but then look confused when you drink their liquor and take a nap in the kitchen