Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of ambamthankyamam's best tweets

@ambamthankyamam : Bicyclists, it's one thing to hog the road, but it's quite another to expect us to know your fancy hand signals. Also, I can see your balls.

@ambamthankyamam: Apparently my hub is a 92 yr old trapped in a younger body. He just referred to you guys as my Pinstagram friends.

@ambamthankyamam: Send prayers. Laura on Facebook didn't realize she was out of syrup until AFTER the pancakes were made! It's causing quite a stir...

@ambamthankyamam: Hey people that twitter says are "similar to me", where do people like us put our car keys?!?!?!

@ambamthankyamam: I saved my husband's life insurance company 1 million dollars by switching to xanax.

@ambamthankyamam: My life coach just asked me leave because apparently she has "other pedicures to do" and doesn't "speak English".