@iamspacegirl: when there was one set of footprints in the sand, that was when I tripped and fell but Jesus didn't see and he kept walking for a little bit
@iamspacegirl: autocorrect: Dan!
me: No no, autocorrect, this is my DAD, we know him.
autocorrect: *growling* Dan.
me: *spritzing my phone with water* NO
@iamspacegirl: a guy told me his name was Drazen earlier and he did not appreciate me asking if that was short for dried raisin
@iamspacegirl: Once again I find myself online shopping for a velvet cloak at 4am. But fear not, me. one day you will be online shopping for something else at 4am whilst wearing a beautiful velvet cloak.
@iamspacegirl: *makes graveyard even scarier by carving all the tombstones into shark fins*
@iamspacegirl: just found myself walking around inspecting things in my front yard with my hands clasped gently behind my back, so my transition into my grandfather is nearly complete
@iamspacegirl: me: Baby shark doo doo doo doo doo doo baby shark doo doo doo doo doo baby shark! Mommy shark doo doo-
Other people on life raft: please stop
@iamspacegirl: Me *writing*: she was like 12 slices of key lime pie in a dress- tart, cool, totally whipped.
Her: I can hear you.
Me: she could hear me
@iamspacegirl: My lasso of truth is just an eel I point aggressively at the people I'm questioning. We have a 100% success rate.