Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of the_paramedicK's best tweets

@the_paramedicK : Mom: why are your eyes dilated Me: your eyes dilate up to 45% when you look at something you love Mom: what were you looking at Me: memes

@the_paramedicK: What idiot named her Miley Cyrus' grandma and not Nana Montana.

@the_paramedicK: *proposes to girlfriend*

*accidentally drops ring in the street*

"I'll still marry you"

Sorry, I'm married to the streets now

@the_paramedicK: "Avocado Kedavra"

-Harry Potter before tuning his enemies into guacamole