Funny Tweeter

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Page of travisauruss's best tweets

@travisauruss : I like my pizza like I like my pizza: pizza

@travisauruss: MAN TO LIZARD: "SO I HEAR YOU'RE IN FLOORING SALES"

LIZARD: "IM MORE IN PROMOTION"

MAN: "WHAT DO YOU DO"

LIZARD: "I REP TILE"

@travisauruss: I think the closest I've come to playing romantic music at a girl's window is when I forgot to turn down "Eye Of The Tiger" at the drivethru

@travisauruss: Blood is thicker than water.
But maple syrup is thicker than blood.
So pancakes are more important than family.
I said it.