@RobDenBleyker: Wait, you didn't let me finish. What I was trying to say is Hitler was largely misunderstood by people who don't speak German.
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@DadandBuried: Women never understand the importance of cords. We NEED to keep all these cords, just in case! What if we run out of cords!
@CynthiaJEllis: News: Ireland has now legalized ecstasy, meth, and mushrooms due to an unexpected legal loophole. In other news: I have a plane to catch.
@squirrel74wkgn: Wife: Are you gonna wear that to the cookout? Oh... *reaches under mesh shirt* *takes off nipple ring* Better?