@deardilettante: Walking around cemeteries looking at headstones is a great way to come up with baby names.
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@bottlerocket: A guy just made fun of me for buying wine coolers at the store. I'm wearing crocs with socks and that's what you're going to make fun of?
@LaptopShopWH: When the atm charges you 3.50 to take out your own money but tells you to cover your pin so you don't get robbed
@TheToddWilliams: ALIEN: What is "January"? ME: That's a month... named after a god ALIEN: Ah, so August is a god ME: Actually, he was a Roman ALIEN: Ah, so October is a Roman ME: Actually, that named after a number ALIEN: Ah, the 10th month so 10 ME: Actually, 8 ALIEN: Ok this is bullshit
@Eightinchgoat: Worst things about mid 40's: 1. Catching a view of yourself naked in the mirror. 2. Crying too hard to complete this list.