@deardilettante: Walking around cemeteries looking at headstones is a great way to come up with baby names.
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@Versacheetos: Kim - Where is North West? Kanye - *takes out compass* Kim - I mean my baby! Kanye - I'm right here. Kim - Jesus Kanye! Kanye - Yeezus*
@dulcetry: One time I got so nervous when a guy took off his pants in front of me I said "friggity diggity" please do not rt
@joeljeffrey: Me: Siri set an alarm for 6am tomorrow morning. I want to go to the gym before work. Siri: Lol
@AndyAsAdjective: HER: I still think you made up that word just so you could win at Scrabble ME: that's ridictacular