@canadasandra: Wanna know what it's like being married? Chain yourself to a wild animal. Now kick the animal.
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@TheMichaelRock: December 23rd should be called Christmas Adam since it always comes before Christmas Eve.
@KimmyMonte: I think the first person to see a pug was like wait why is that sweet potato snorting?
@coketruck76: 13: Dad, do you believe in miracles? Me: Do you remember spray painting my car? 13: yeah M: Are you breathing? 13: yeah M: Well, there ya go
@MrMildSauce: Safety Tip: lock your doors and windows before bed. Btw, I love what you've done with the place.