@DaHess1: Wanna screw with your idiot friends on Facebook? Post that Obama passed a law to stay in office a third term this morning. Praise Jesus.
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@clemdytan: I shot my first Turkey today. Scared the shit out of everyone in the frozen food section, it was awesome!
@CornOnTheGoblin: We have to operate now if the cancer spreads anymore you won't be able to tell the difference between people & food "Are you nuts?" Dear God
@ScorpionDong: Hangs a sign on front door that says "Robbery in progress - Please do not disturb" to deter burglars
@juliussharpe: I don't get why everyone talks so fast in old movies. What was the hurry? There was nothing to do back then.