@SortaBad: Waterskiing is fun. I wish there were more sports where machines just dragged you around
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@UncleDuke1969: [mall] Wife: Wait here. Me: Okay. Wife: Hold my purse. Me: Yes, ma'am. *looks in purse* *waves at testicles* Me: *sigh* I miss you guys!
@Laser_Cat: Do you Karen promise to love and to cherish Mark, always put the toilet paper on the roll over the top, and not leave crumbs in the butter?
@AnniemuMary: My husband got new earbuds. Think I'll skip the middle man and put them straight in the washing machine.