@isabelzawtun: We all talk about the early bird getting the worm but what if I'm a worm and sleeping in could save my life
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@lucidchemistry: ME: Who's my little sex kitten? HER: *slowly pushes me off bed* ME: [from floor] That's right baby.
@HeatherLuvsYou: A foreign kid asked me how to speak English the other day, so I teached him some.
@Adar79Angie: I wish my car ran on shattered dreams instead of gas. I'd be able to make it to Canada on my failed ninja goals alone.