@iscoff: We'd like to sincerely apologize for booking the Karate Convention on the same day as the Rare Wooden Boards Fair
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@david8hughes: [ouija board] "Spirits are u there? I A M H E R E. Y O U W A N N A T A L K? Y O U W A N N A H A N G O U T? [squints] "A needy board?"
@jferg1616: Best Buy: What's your street name? Me: FUNK MASTER FERG bia bia! Best Buy: No, the name of your street.
@trojansauce: [me as a poltergeist] *putting forks in the spoon section of the cutlery drawer* ooooOooOooooo