@Donna_McCoy: Welcome to Passive Aggressive Club. We all got here early, but you just take your time.
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@ThisOneSayz: Me: excuse me, but I can't taste the alcohol Clerk: all smoothies are non alcoholic here. Me: YOU SHOULDN'T CALL YOURSELF A BAR THEN!
@jwoodham: Forrest Gump ran for 3 years, 2 months, and 14 days, which is approximately 3 years, 2 months, and 14 days longer than I've ever run.
@JennyJohnsonHi5: I think it's weird how President Obama appointed George Clooney Secretary Of Handsome. #DNC
@JamieGreenlees: I thought it was impossible to do 450 push ups in a minute until I discovered lying