@MelvinofYork: Well hello, "Party-Size" bag of Doritos. Welcome to my party! There will be no other guests.
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@Papa_Mex: Either the dude in the bathroom was having a surprise birth, or he needs to eat a LOT less hay in his diet....
@BoomBoomBetty: If you see me in the baby section at the store, there’s no bun in the oven. Just a cat at home that clearly needs a onesie.
@Brianhopecomedy: *2 year old runs by screaming* *72 ducks chasing her* "YOU HAVE TO LET GO OF THE BREAD."