@Nikkeya08: We're just two people shitting in side by side stalls waiting for the other person to go out so we don't have to show our face
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@Barknado69: "I got your back" "And I got your nose" "Ooh I want his feet" Mr. Potato Head: *sobbing* guys stop it
@Cherhole: There was a girl pushing an suv this morning while the guy steered. Feminists everywhere must be scissoring in victory.
@dorkwing_duck: Fox Mulder, age 6: *looks under pillow* MOM! IT DISAPPEARED! Mom: the Tooth Fairy took it, dear Fox: you mean... the tooth is out there?