@Jez1: What do I want to do to your body? I don't know. Identify it, I guess.
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@loribuckmajor: Sometimes when my family is especially ungrateful, I don't wash the vegetables when I make their salads.
@mstluvstrinkets: Her: I'm running a little late. M: how many more seconds er I mean yeah sure take your time. Me, trying to play it cool with the babysitter
@bobvulfov: [standing at the hospital nursery window with other new parents] ME: this zoo is terrible
@KentWGraham: ME: My New Year’s resolution is to eat less WIFE: Good! ME: (very, very quietly) …vegetables.