@Jez1: What do I want to do to your body? I don't know. Identify it, I guess.
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@LorieGZ: My husband thinks The Bachelor show is fake, they're all there to be actors, and that it's total bullshit. Then he turned to wrestling.
@HrBry: Told my dealer I wanted a shitload of Coke but autocorrect changed it to shipload now I owe a Columbian cartel 18 million dollars
@underchilde: Being surrounded by family and friends is cool unless it's a seance and you're dead.
@VampireIguana: Adam: Eve, you read the terms and conditions before using that Apple product right? Eve: Uh yeah, totally